On Being Dietetically Defunct

So I'm about to get honest with you. Candid, honest, and possibly a little gross.

But I think we're all friends here.

I have had stomach issues for as long as I can remember. Tummy troubles. Poopy problems. Whatever you call it, that's where I am.

source- I know it looks crazy but it was too funny to pass up!

Growing up I would often get sick after dinner. 

[I won't necessarily define "sick" for you as I'm sure you can infer from the previous "poopy problems" reference.]

In college it got worse. But given the diet of college students, that's not really a surprise. Pizza and popcorn and a little too much beer.

Graduate school came and I finally went to a tummy doctor and said "help!" It seemed like things just kept getting worse.

It was always the same. 

I would eat. 5 minutes later my stomach would start to hurt. 1 minute later I would run, clutching my stomach, to the nearest bathroom. Any bathroom. Trust me, I lost my fear of public potties a long time ago.

Then, after feeling like my was stomach was exploding, I would be back to normal.

I would eat a burger one day and be sick. I would eat a burger one day and be fine. I would eat the greasiest meal ever and be fine. The next day I would eat cereal and get sick. 

I didn't seem to make sense.

After a variety of conversations and tests (of a highly uncomfortable nature), the doctor determined I had IBS, irritable bowel syndrome. Also known as "something's wrong with your stomach but we just don't know what."

So I went along my merry way. I was still getting sick periodically but I was managing. 

Then last year I started to get sick again very frequently. My husband had the great idea of limiting dairy. What if I was lactose intolerant? It seemed to make sense. My classic example of explaining my frustration was "I can eat cheesy greasy food and I get sick, but then I also have a bowl of cereal and get sick." What I was trying to express that it seemed like everything (heavy and light foods, good and bad for me foods) was making me sick. 

But aha, a connection. Milk.

So about a year ago I cut our dairy (ish). I relied heavily on Lactaid pills to aid in the digestion of lactose in my tummy. Things seemed to be going great...

until now.

And it's really got me down.

Lately, when I look at food, I see an enemy staring back at me.

I'm afraid to eat anywhere but the comfort of my own home.

If I need to eat and then run an errand I have to eat long before I leave for fear of being on the highway and praying (like in those commercials) that a port-o-potty will fall from the sky.

I've lost weight. [Which has been on the to-do list for quite some time, but not quite like this.]

I feel a bit broken these days. Like I got reject parts. 

Now my diet plan consists of no dairy, fried food, greasy food, baked goods or sugars.

I was at a luncheon the other day and everything had cheese or cream in it. All the desserst were dairy based. And after I grabbed my plate to make a big 'ole salad, the only dressing they had was Caesar.

Needless to say I came home and ate chicken noodle soup.

And it's amazing, when you can't eat a lot, food takes on a whole new perspective. Eating to sustain versus eating because you're bored is quite a new concept for me.

So what's a girl to do?

Doctor last week.
Allergy tests.

Searching out a dietician?

More tests?

I'd love a magical list of all the things I can eat. Even if it's really really tiny, at least I would know!

So why am I telling you all of this? Well, I think we're at that point in our relationship where we can share. And I think any new followers probably hit "unsubscribe" after my first "poop" reference.

I know this sounds silly, but could you add my poor little tummy to your prayer list? It needs a bit of healing these days.